The written expression of your Eternal Identity — the personal commitments that define who you choose to be across every season of life. It answers one question: across every season of my life, who am I committed to being?
This is the one place in the book where you don't wait. Everything that follows — your faith, your career, your money, your marriage — gets filtered through what you write here.
Before you write
Three lenses
Your premortal self tells you who you were meant to become. Your 80-year-old self reminds you of who you still can become. And the man you are today is the bridge between the two.
Lens One
Your premortal self
You chose mortality — even with the veil, even with the risk. You fought for your agency. Whatever you said in those final moments before you stepped through wasn't a pep talk. It was a covenant between who you were and who you are still capable of becoming.
Lens Two
Your 80-year-old self
Gray hair, worn hands, a lifetime behind him. He has lived long enough to know what actually matters. The emotions that feel huge to you now feel small to him, because the perspective you don't yet have, he has in full.
Lens Three
Your patriarchal blessing
Read it again carefully. Look for patterns, gifts, responsibilities — the kind of man the Lord is trying to shape you into. It isn't a script for your life, but it can remind you of your divine identity and the life God is inviting you to build.
When a decision contradicts your Identity Standard, it's the wrong decision. Full stop.
Step 1 of 6
Before you begin
The best way to start is to set aside quiet, uninterrupted time.
No phone. No noise. No rushing.
This isn't something you rush through. Take your time. Be honest. Be clear. What you write here becomes the filter for every major decision you make from this point forward.
Give it about 30 minutes. If you don't have 30 uninterrupted minutes right now, come back when you do — that's not a delay, it's the assignment.
Take a moment and imagine it. Your name was called. You knew that once you stepped through the veil, you wouldn't remember any of it.
A few I’ve heard men land on: “You’ve got this.” · "Don't waste this gift." · "Trust Him." · "I fought for this chance. Use it." · "Live with purpose. Don't drift."
Step 3 of 6
Your 80-year-old self
Picture yourself at 80. Gray hair, worn hands, a lifetime behind you. This man has lived long enough to know what actually matters.
A few I’ve heard men land on: “Protect your testimony.” · "Choose good people." · "Make decisions your future family will thank you for." · "Stop trading long-term peace for short-term comfort." · "Be intentional. I'm counting on you."
Step 4 of 6
Your patriarchal blessing
Go read it again carefully. Look for patterns. Look for gifts. Look for responsibilities. Look for the kind of man the Lord is trying to shape you into.
Your patriarchal blessing is not a script for your life, but it can remind you of your divine identity, your potential, and the life God is inviting you to build.
Write only your own reflections here — patterns you noticed, gifts you were reminded of. Don't transcribe the words of your blessing. It's sacred and personal, and it doesn't belong in a form.
Haven't received your patriarchal blessing yet? That's completely fine — skip this step. Consider preparing for it and getting it. Your Identity Standard doesn't wait on it.
Step 5 of 6
Write your commitments
Write 5–10 clear statements in the present tense — like it's already true of you. Keep the language clear and direct. This isn't the place for vague hopes.
Your statements should describe
the kind of man you are committed to becoming
the standards you want your present self to live by
the man your future self would be grateful you stayed true to
If you get stuck, answer these
What kind of man am I committed to being consistently?
What values will guide my decisions when no one is watching?
What behaviors am I unwilling to compromise on?
What does discipleship look like for me in real life?
First — what matters most to you?
Pick as many as fit. The examples below will change to match.
Examples — tap to use, then make them yours
These are not affirmations. They are commitments. Only write down what you're actually willing to be held to — because you will be.
Step 6 of 6
One last question
Read what you wrote. Slowly.
Life doesn't respond to vague intentions. It responds to clear instructions. If your Identity Standard is fuzzy, life will fill in the gaps for you — and it will rarely fill them the way you would have chosen.
If any line made you hesitate, go back and change it. Hesitation is information.
Your Identity Standard
Done. Now keep it where you'll see it.
This is who I choose to be, in alignment with who I have always been, and who I am becoming.
Written · Welcome Home, Elder. Now What? — Chapter 3
Keep this page somewhere you will see it every day. Taped to your mirror, in your scriptures, in your wallet, or as the lock screen on your phone — so that it can guide your decisions in real time.
This is not about perfection. It is about direction. Your Identity Standard is not meant to change daily — it's meant to anchor you daily.
From here on, the most important question is no longer "what feels right in this moment?" It's "Does this choice align with the man I have chosen to become?"
Nothing you wrote was sent anywhere. This tool runs entirely in your browser — if you close this tab without saving, printing, or downloading, it's gone for good.